As you prepare for your wedding day, think not only of the man who will be your husband, but also of the women who will be by your side --- and make some promises to them, too! So hold onto your Martha's Weddings, raise your right hand, and repeat after me: "I, Ms. Bride-to-Be, vow to . . ."
Spend quality time with my bridesmaids.
This means wedding time, and non-wedding time. With so many things on your wedding to-do list, why not tackle them together? Make a date to go hunting for the perfect favor, the ideal china, or just the right veil. It's a great time for your maids to bond, so include some group outings as well. Be sure to bring a camera (or even a video camera) to document the hijinks and memories along the way --- not just the posed big-day portraits. On the flip side, all wedding and no play makes you a dull Bride, so leave the w-word at home and get out with the girls into the no-nuptials zone! "It was nice to go out with the bride and spend time together the way we did before she got engaged," said Jessica Donsky. "Not having everything revolve around her wedding made me feel that that she was still interested in what was going on in my life."
Be reasonable in my requests.
After they have hotglued the two-hundred-and-twenty-ninth bow on your miniature flowerpots is not the time to break out the invitations to address. Your maids may give you an extra helping of their Saturday afternoons --- but no need to sell them into slavery! Try putting together a game plan of some "work parties," such as a two-hour program folding/pizza fest or a seating chart social with wine and cheese. Also, show some respect for their pocketbooks. If the engagement party is in California and your maid lives in Connecticut, advance notice can help her budget accordingly. Think of ways to help out, such as sharing a ride or having her stay with a friend --- it all adds up!
Now, the bane of the bridesmaid: the dress. Even the most tasteful of brides can go starry-eyed when faced with a Scarlett O'Hara hoop skirt and matching hat in turquoise taffeta. To keep your judgment on track, consider taking your maids shopping for their dress. Together, my sister/maid of honor and I found one that was easy on both the eyes and the wallet. Just try to keep your wedding-crazed alter ego in check --- and maintain your sense of humor!
Show my appreciation.
These are the women who will spend hours scouring stores for just the right shade of peach ribbon, who will dance 'till dawn at your bachelorette party, who will stand beside you as you commit to the man of your dreams. The best way for you to let them know how much their support means to you? "When I was a bridesmaid, the nicest thing my friend did was to pull me aside after the wedding and really thank me," said Kristin Reed. "Her kind words made me even happier that I had been a part of her wedding!" Whether a springtime tea or desserts by the fire, it's also thoughtful to hold a thank-you event just for your bridesmaids. This is an ideal time to give them a gift to remember, such as an engraved jewelry box or a framed photograph.
So with these vows, I, Ms. Bride-to-Be, promise to love and cherish my dearest friends in wedding picture perfection and in post-party hangover, before dress shopping and after, wherever and whenever, from this day forward. Now where's that champagne?
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